Feeling confused

I don't really know what to think anymore.  Monday was supposed to be the first sure day my cycle could start.  I know this because I tempt sporadically just to see where about in my cycle I'm at.  Today I'm spotting so either I now have another problem to deal with or this is implantation bleeding.  I want to hope for the second one, but lately I just haven't been feeling it, which is okay.  I just really do feel like my cycle is starting.  Some of the older ladies around me keep saying oh you're young and don't worry, but I don't actually feel that young and really would just like to feel like I have some control.  That is always what it comes down to is having some kind of control. Well soon I will know more.

Olivia